If there is a trip-switch, let’s say, and it does, with regards my particular brain, cause my mind to fall into an unholy place of rumination, then I’m going to have to become stronger than I’ve ever been before with the ocd. I need to… do more than just keep going, because that still seems to mean an horrendous amount of mixed-up mind and brain. It’s too difficult for me to continue on with this thing, even at its present level, which is way better than ever before. I need what does feel like superhuman strength to let it all just be there and fall away to nothing as best that I can. Maybe that is actual superhuman strength by its truest definition, because it still feels like an ask on a person’s part which they really should not have to be tasked with ever asking themselves. But I must. I will. Just that I’m not entirely sure about that always being the case right now. There’s no level of self-pity here, not for a second. Just… mental turmoil. And my hopes to stop it.