There is a delicate nature that precedes the entire thing, really. This… feeling of… I dunno! Just a fucking feeling that all of the possible words out there and all of their synonyms are at my sudden and poignant disposal; as though my wired mind can do absolutely anything and everything when it comes to landing that decidedly perfect poem/piece. But then, when it is complete – maybe in, say, forty-minutes, tops… I don’t feel anything like being remotely connected with it anymore, maybe just a deeper need to attempt to slowly but surely use it as an advantageous stepping-stone in finally, invaluably, causing a stringent connection with its overall greater learned purpose. In other words, perhaps the ceaseless, mind-soothing process that both precedes as well as succeeds each and every one of my pieces of… ahem, literature is the thing that might need to now be finally focused on. There definitely has to be some kind of a seriously homegrown shake-up in my style because it’s not the sort of connection with a piece of creation that I imagine, for instance, an artist can rather gently gather with the time they take in nudging their work towards its excitable completion. It also, I am learning as I go, seems to me that words really aren’t quite the right framing for my vision. And that is probably why I have no real respect for writers in general. Does every fucking accountant in the world have to give a nod to every fucking other one of him out there!!? Not. One. Bit. Also why I really do loath the mere idea of a goddamn writing group. It is SO BLOODY STUNTING. Truth is, even if many will disagree, I find it the easiest, most jaded and time-weary medium out there. For instance, half-an-hour into this note and I’ve already simultaneously set up my next poem within a pull-and-grab from seven standout words and statements. I don’t decide if it makes plausible sense – it’s the individual readers, as rare as they may well be for now, who often are decent enough to inform me of the ability it has to set their visual imagination at full tilt when read aloud, that wholly and wholeheartedly decide. Basically, I have no business being here. In this medium. However, rest assured I will keep plugging away until I can both figuratively and literally make it my business.

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