Had to do it, didn’t I
Go deep
Deeper than I’d ever done before
She was a bit of a bitch
& one helluva whore
Spent all of her God damn time banging on my back door
Sex to one side
She talked all night about the utter shite that came with her life
Unpaid bills, Stealing from old folks – one foot in the grave – with their unsecured corner shop tills
Oh the spills she’s had
A boyfriend who wouldn’t stop paying even though it was supposed to be free for him
All he ever did was smack her hard while spending the rest of his day down the gym
She smoked a cigarette over my chest
Clocked my you-know-what & said she couldn’t help but be impressed
A back-handed compliment ‘cos I was ready for bed
If she didn’t shut up I was gonna be next in line to smack her upside that head
“Will you write a poem about me?
I kissed her hard, told her I would
Went about fondling her breasts
I’ll never miss her because she’s too much hassle for someone like me
Someone who likes the simple life
A few good screws & as time passes by a family & a wife
If she ever calls she’s going to get the wrong guy
‘Cos I wrote down the wrong number
Ready for an all too welcome slumber
All screwed out
Here’s hoping a shy guy gets the time of his life when she gives him that shout
Either that or she comes face to face with a crazy fool who has nothing for direction other than a Stanley knife