no person no thing no nothing please no more words no more worries and no more intelligence no nothing why do I have to reconfigure these words and why must I feel undeniably stuck and pained and bothered by it all? I don’t want to have this nasty potential inside of me because I do have it and only I can ultimately know this feeling of having to create ONE GODDAMN MASTERPIECE!! Is this website a whole waste of time a waste of everything that I wanted to ultimately create!? I’m in pain because I’m empathetic but neither do I get to explain how good a person I want to be I can’t feel it for myself even – I want to know how to care for myself like I care for others I have exhausted every avenue but nothing can hurt anymore not like it used to anyway these ugly looking words on a page and a writer who knows that his work shouldn’t be stuck on a page it has to be… felt.