https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/aug/01/living-with-ocd-survival-poison-contaminated-food

As much as it absolutely pains me to say it, with OCD (my kind at least), you are basically hanging onto your sanity one second at a time. And none of that heady description will ever go anywhere near explaining the out-and-out turmoil and fear of mind that occurs. Again. Continuously. However, the only person that you will ever need to successfully convince of this is, unfortunately, yourself. So far I’ve been trying for most of my life. So far, it has been an outright miracle that I am somehow still standing upright and fighting. M-I-R-A-C-L-E.