“Is this okay?”

“Yeeess. Of course. Settle yourself down, please.”

“‘Kay. I’m quite nervous tonight, so you know.”

“It’s fine, lots of men can get to be that way actually, so You know.”

“Thanks… for… understanding? You’re very pretty. No. Not pretty – beautiful!!”

“I like compliments, they stir a girl’s senses. And you, young man, can stir all night long if you wish.”

“Ha-hee… you think I look alright then?”

Hell yeah!! You’re quite a dapper individual – really mannerly too. Something I love to see. Here, come sit on the bed with me. And take off your top, it will relax things a little. Promise.”

“‘Kay then. So you know, I’ve never done any of this before.”

“With a girl like me?”

“Yeah. Well… THAT and any girl really. I’m-a vir-virgiiiin.”

“Cucumber cooool.”

“Huh, cucumber what!?”

“Haha!! You know, cool as a cuc… listen put your shirt on the table. Throw it… … that’s it.”

“Can you show me what I need to do, please? There is a girl I like and she will expect me to be good.”

“Of course, baby. I got this. Just lie back. That’s right… like that. These trousers are nice – Hilfiger?”

“Ahh, ye-eeah. Finest for you.”

“Okay. I’m gonna pull these bad boys right the way dowww… shit!! Wow. Oh my, that’s a little treat.”

“Little!!? But…”

“No, noooo!!! Figure of speech. It’s… ahem, I dunno what it is, actually.”

“It’s a game-changer is what it is, my dear.”

“So, tell me… hell, show me, is it true what they say? That writer’s fuck like it’s their last day on earth?”

“Ha. Sure thing. Let’s get to the sordid details between these sheets before my expiry date arrives then.”