Watching The Society of Snow, an okay remake, I guess you could call it, of Alive. Crazy shit happened to those people, indeed. Fine film, is what it is, and besides I know the real deal with it anyway… so. Otherwise? I’m ok, brain trying to figure “that problem” out once and for all. To finally figure that one thing/theme out once and for all… and everything is figured-out, or at least… I’ll get to think in a straight-line, which would normally be absolutely true only this isn’t a normal thought for me to figure-out and move on with. Not by a long-shot. It stays… stuck, such is the way of the OCD imbalance 🙄 The theme has fallen back atop itself yet again, it seems. Or at least it is trying to typically do that particular thing, only I’m staying as aware and as wary as I can even if my brain and mind aren’t, as I’ve said before, able to actually realise/remember that it even is a mental illness/disorder that I’m dealing with from one second to the next. Like… the rumination’s are happening, perhaps, in the exact same place where normal thoughts go to be entertained, enthused. Again, I dunno the ins-and-outs of a brain’s mechanisms but… yeah, I’ll most probably fall back into this whole theme and needless mental onslaught again. I try but, really, all of these posts don’t seem to do anything whatsoever in readying my mind/brain for living well with and even so much as living without entertaining the immediate imbalance that grips my brain over again and again. I’ve beaten it a billion times, so to speak. I mean, I’ve understood the utter illogic of the whole OCD imbalance in the first place and, yet, my brain will not move away and on from it. A) because it’s chronically imbalanced, my brain, and b) because… how in the name of shit is a person who has suffered so much from this habitually engrained illogical mental shit inside of their head supposed to suddenly… just let it be there – the chemical imbalance? 🧐 It’s not like there is an actually answer, an equation to figure-out and then, well, cured. The only way is going against everything and not entertaining the imbalance, which is single-handedly doing everything in its imbalanced power to be figured-out. Distorted is the word. But other words too would be: flabbergasting; crushing; inexplicable; drowning; chaotic; chronic and unnecessary 😃