I guess the truth of having OCD is utterly fucking agonising. It is a mental mind-field which no one deserves, let alone needs, to be playing with themselves and their brain. It’s atrocious how far it can knock a person off-centre, mentally. Often-times, and they may even only ever get to realise this in hindsight and at becoming, please God, better to an invaluable extent, they will have, let’s say, mentally disappeared from the real world for even so much as years at a time. Decades even. By that, I mean that they are in NO WAY WHATSOEVER able to even begin to grasp, on a mental note, at thinking the way a person gets to think minus having OCD. Whatever the hell that is even like. An uninterrupted brain by the absolute shit-show inside of the mind that is the fallout from OCD. For me, it is indescribable what it does manage to take away from an otherwise perfectly working mind, it seems. And I accept that, I even understand that it can make a person stronger in the general scheme of things. I work with it. But I also literally forget I have it, sometimes even minutes after I may have figured one way or the other with my mind, “Christ, this is absolutely the greatest mental waste of time in the world!” because it is THAT all over the place in terms of the imbalance inside of my brain happening and at any time. I am tasked, wholeheartedly, I have to state, with letting an outlandish mental imbalance be there, inside of my brain, helped of course by strong medication and running and keeping my mind in as good a place and as good a shape as I possibly can manage, and handle. You learn how you are as a person when it comes to having this particular disorder only ever in a clear instance, really, by managing at silencing the imbalanced brain’s misfiring mechanisms to a suitable enough extent. To get to the true you, is what I mean there, you have to do it all with an imbalance which will do one of two such things and that’s it, really. It will either send the sufferer’s mind utterly barking-mad lopsided and agonisingly discombobulated and distorted AND SEARCHING FOR A CALM that isn’t there, or it will, well, not do any of those above-mentioned things, therein you can get to live a life of straight-forward thinking until you get to actually inevitably, for the most part, maybe if you are extremely lucky in your dealings with it, in your unspeakable level of mental resilience paying off, interpret your own feelings and emotions and approach to everything in your life in a normal-minded manner. Or as close to normal-minded as possible for the sufferer of OCD 😊 Yes, it’s a task of mind and brain that doesn’t bear mentioning really. Except, of course, that I do more than mention it, and will continue to do so, because it helps me, first and foremost of course, and if that also eventually helps others then fucking fantastic, ‘cos I know that that is arguably the greatest thing I could ever end up giving to someone 🤷‍♂️ A life. An extraordinary one, even. A kid with OCD who needs to read it… even if again and again and again ❤️ Because to that kid I would seriously say: “Wow, buddy… what the ****, you’re a Trojan in ways I cannot even begin to imagine someone ever becoming, and for that I salute you from start to finish. It wasn’t supposed to be anywhere near this messed up, but by God, you kiiiinda rode that particular wave like a dream, really” 😃